"If you like grape rillos then you're alright,

but if you like peach rillos then fuck you":

Listening to Brand new is calming for me, not all of their music is calming, but for me, it calms me down. Something about it,

I've realized that I like to have goals for myself. I don't necessarily set them but they give me something to look forward to. Having something to look forward to helps keep me moving. Without this thing to look forward to, it's hard for me. The fear of losing the thing I look forward to the most is harder though,

Haha,

I feel like I have to critique everything I write. Like I'll read it and then erase it like no that doesn't sound good. I'm not sure why I do that. This blog for me is more like the thought process that goes on in my head. I can't critique my thoughts.

I'm trying to be more grown up about things in my life. From my point of view I feel grown, not like an adult but grown enough. From other's point of view, say older people, I'm just a kid. The way I look at some people sometimes, like they're so naive and young. (shakes head) I'm still that.

It's like a "Calling someone fat doesn't make you any skinnier.." -- type of thing.

Like I said, I'm trying. It's a lot harder than I thought. I still have things that I want to do that would be considered not "adult". I just don't give a fuck. But trying to be grown should be more important. That's why I said, trying.

ps- being unselfish sucks :/

You're so good at talking smack, heart attack,

but you're the apple of my eye anyway.